The Role a Father Plays
in His Daughter's Life
Fathers and daughters
share a unique bond. Women lucky enough to have had a good relationship with
their fathers as children can look back fondly on special occasions such as
birthdays and family parties, whilst also treasuring memories of everyday pleasures
like trips to the park or cozy bedtime stories.
Not only does a girl’s
relationship with her father shape her childhood experience, but it will also
influence how she interacts with men in her adult years. If a father is absent
or erratic in his behavior, this sets his daughter up for feelings of low
self-esteem and trouble with trusting men in general. All parents should
therefore appreciate the importance of understanding the father’s role in his
daughter’s life, as his presence (or absence) will play a role in her
self-image and well being for decades to come.
Research has shown that
women who enjoy more supportive, close relationships with their fathers tend to
be less stressed and to view themselves in a more positive light compared with
those who have more conflicted or toxic bonds.
So what are the traits
a man should look to develop in order to build a strong father daughter
relationship?
Model
a Respectful Attitude Towards Women
A good father does not
make sexist jokes or speak disrespectfully about women. He has the intelligence
to realize that his daughter’s self-image will suffer if he does so, and knows
that it is important to uphold the idea that women are of equal value to men.
Inspire
His Daughter to Reach Her Goals
A father should encourage
his daughter to follow her dreams and show her that he believes she has what it
takes to succeed. Girls habitually look to both parents for guidance and
support, so fathers must make the effort to inspire their daughters whenever
possible
Teach
His Daughter That She Is Worthy of a Respectful Partner
A father who treats his
daughter – and his daughter’s mother – with respect is sending a clear message
that women deserve good treatment from the men in their lives. This can make
all the difference when his daughter begins dating. If she is used to positive
support and kind behavior, she is less likely to tolerate it from abusive dates
and partners.
Make
Time for His Daughter, No Matter How Busy He Is
One of the most
important things a father can do is simply show that he is willing to be
around. He should make the effort to attend special events at his daughter’s
school, engage her in conversation, and take an interest in all areas of her
life. This will build her self-esteem and let her know that she is a worthwhile
individual.
Enjoy
Activities Together
Healthy activities such
as walking, biking and swimming are a great way of building memories and
teaching your daughter that exercise is an important habit. Keeping fit will
help her maintain a good body image, which will be a real asset as she develops
into a teenager.
Be
Consistently Loving but Firm
Daughters who do not
receive affection and approval from their fathers are likely to seek it
elsewhere as teenagers and adults, and this may lead to an unhealthy dependency
on men. Fathers can prevent this happening by telling their daughters how
special and loved they are, whilst maintaining appropriate levels of discipline
and upholding firm boundaries.
Know
When to Ask for Forgiveness
No father can be
perfect all the time. When you mess up, explain how you plan to do better next
time and tell her that you are sorry. For example, if you accidentally miss her
piano recital, plan an outing to make it up to her. Ask for her forgiveness and
learn from your mistakes.
Always
Treat Her Mother Well, Even If They Are Not Together
If a daughter witnesses
her father treating her mother poorly, she will receive negative or mixed
messages about how men and women relate to one another. Even if you are not
with her mother, always take the high road and act in a civil manner.
Take
Her on Special Trips and Outings
Let your daughter feel
special by making the time to take her out on a regular basis. A simple trip to
the park with a picnic is enough to show her that you care enough to make her a
priority. Take the opportunity to show her how men should treat women – with
respect and dignity. Engage her in conversation and talk to her as an equal.
Show
Her That Men Can Be Comfortable with Their Feminine Side
Even if you are a
traditionally macho man, it is healthy to show your gentle side once in a
while. Allow your young daughter to paint your nails, or why not go to a spa
for the day when she is a little older? You should also be comfortable showing
affection through kind words and gestures. This will allow her to grow up with
a balanced view of the different ways in which men can behave.
Remind
Her That She Is Beautiful Inside and Out
There is nothing wrong
with telling your daughter that she is pretty, but remember to tell her how
much you value her intellectual abilities and character. This will prevent her
from relying on her looks to carry her through life and from placing too much
value on what others think of her face and body.
Source: Lifehack.org
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