I’m sure if you are a
quiet person, you are under constantly assumed to be shy, impolite, timid, or
even arrogant. I feel you. But in reality, most quiet people don’t fit into the
assumptions, and the reason for these misconceptions and misunderstandings is
because we communicate in a different way.
There’s no right or
wrong when it comes to communication, and I think it’s time to let everyone
know how we act and think as quiet people.
We
are quiet in person, talkative in mind.
When we don’t say
anything, it doesn’t mean our minds are blank.
Stephen Hawking once said, “Quiet people have the loudest minds.” It’s true, we store a lot of deep thoughts in our minds, but we keep our sarcastic comments and jokes in our brains as well.
We are usually
thinkers, and often over-thinkers. We create conversations in our heads to help
us think, plan, evaluate, and execute our ideas before saying it out loud or
diving into actions.
We
gain information through different means.
While some people learn
about others through interactions and exchanging information in conversations,
we like to observe others and everything happening around.
Say you meet someone
new. What that person is wearing, their body language, and eye contact can give
you a rough idea of who that person is.
Of course, sometimes
simply by observation is not enough, quiet people do start conversations when
we are interested to know more about a certain person.
We
are not necessarily shy.
The general norm is the
more you speak, the more confident you sound. And sometimes, people categorize
all quiet people as lacking confidence or scared to present themselves. But for
some quiet people, we are not afraid of the spotlight, and we are sociable too.
Speaking to us is a preference rather than a must-do action in social
situations. We don’t mind to share our ideas, thoughts, and experiences.
We
don’t hate you because we are quiet.
The easiest way to tell
the other person you are interested in develop a relationship is definitely
through speaking. But just because we aren’t as talkative as others, we don’t
mean to be rude or cold. There are still many ways and channels to express our
affection to our loved ones.
Everyone has a
different idea on what it means to be “neutral”. Some people believe they must
be smiling and asking “how are you” to convey a message of “we’re good”. But
for others, like quiet people, we believe indicating “everyone’s fine as when
it was one hour ago” is to do nothing. In this sense, quiet people are deemed
as cold or mean, because we express the same message differently.
We
take speaking seriously.
We believe we need to
think carefully before we say anything, because there are way too many times
where something is said at the wrong time, wrong place, and to the wrong
person.
And don’t get me wrong,
I am not saying talkative people don’t think before they speak. I enjoy
listening to talkative people share their stories and fill the room with their
presence. Just we hold different thoughts about what speaking should mean.
It’s
not about helping a quiet person, but understanding.
From time to time,
others want to “help” me (with a good intention) in sharing sessions. They
think I have stage fright, or I can’t come up with things to say, or I have
problem disclosing information about myself. To some quiet people, these
assumptions might be true, but for me, I don’t find expressing myself
difficult.
I
hope this article gives you more insight to quiet people and I’m sure you gain
more perspective on how yourself or others think!
If
you love this article please comment in the comment box below
Source: Lifehack
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